The Safety Trap
In Jonathan Haidt’s book, The Coddling of the American Mind, he writes how good intentions and bad ideas are ruining a generation of kids. He said that safetyism, trigger warnings and safe spaces are counter-productive and that stressors are a part of life. We must prepare the child for the road not the road for the child. Over protection equals bad consequences. We must give kids the freedom to develop their anti-fragility and when we don’t challenge ourselves physically and mentally, we deteriorate.
When children are raised in a culture of safetyism, which teaches them to stay “emotionally safe” while protecting them from every imaginable danger, it may set up a feedback loop: kids become more fragile and less resilient, which signals to adults that they need more protection, which then makes them even more fragile and less resilient.
My sister-in-law has parents that come in with their teenager for a job interview. Last week, a school principal sent home a letter warning parents that their child was about to be offered a free Canadian flag and if they didn’t want to receive one, they should send the attached form back. The Canadian flag is now offensive to some of the powers that be in Ontario’s education systems. It should shock people to know that the ministry of education would also find a way to make math about racism. Perhaps it’s time for the underworked civil servants pushing this agenda to take a bow. Of course if you disagree with ‘approved’ narrative you are uninformed, uneducated and quite possibly a bigot. So much for having healthy debates.
I get an allergic reaction whenever I see someone that is virtue signalling and nothing triggers me more than a false claim of victimhood. This whole idea of helplessness really nauseates me. When did we start raising weak and easily intimidated kids? Am I the only one? When did action, resilience and kicking some butts become offensive? We need to learn how to communicate, stand in our power, take criticism, learn how to fail, and get back up and manage conflict and expose ourselves to viewpoints that are different from our own. These life skills build on each other until one day you have the confidence to go out into the world and to stay out there.
Teen mental health fell off the rail with the advent of social media starting in 2010. It should never be a free for all and experts recommend keeping your kids off social media until after puberty. The adolescent girl has so many issues going on simultaneously. I was uncomfortable in my own skin at this age. I’m just so thankful my parents allowed these growth spirts and not feel compelled to “fix” me as so many parents do today. Dr Haidt’s advice to any young person is to take charge of your own life and your development because if you don’t social media will take over and so will the older protective generation around you.
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