our dreams mean something... so they tell me.

One of my longstanding goals is communication excellence. To stand up on matters that are important to me and speak my mind. To be able to say the right thing to the right people at the right time on a more consistent basis.

One of the reasons I joined Toastmasters a couple of years ago was so that I could develop good communication skills.

I have this recurring dream that I'm speechless. It use to happen quite a bit...about once a week. I would wake up all sweaty and then relieved that it was all just another dream. But I was perplexed. Why am I dreaming this repeatedly. I knew it meant something but I never thought much about my dreams before.

here's what would happen in the dream. I'm in a room with a bunch of people I either know or don't know. It could be a meeting, a wedding, at a party or even out at a restaurant. Things are normal and conversation is flowing and then suddenly something happens.... I have the floor. It's my turn to speak. Oh No. I don't know what to say. I've lost my voice. I open my mouth and nothing comes out. I can't formulate any words. Too much time has gone by. This is awkward. All eyes are on me. I have nothing to say.

I wince myself awake and try to figure out what happened and why I was tongue-tied and what the similarities were in these circumstances. Well like most people's reported dreams, they don't make any senss and I still can't really figure it out. In other words up until I lose my voice, everything was flowing and natural.

I still don't know why I had keep having this one dream and/or why it went away suddenly and when it might come back. I suspect that it had something to do with my past and not opening up or communicating my feelings and not feeling safe talking to people. I certainly grew up in an environment that really wasn't that safe to communicate. There was a lot of criticism and saracasm that alienated us. I chose to withdrawl from communicating because I couldn't trust anyone with my feelings. My feelings didn't count.

I had a huge lump in my thyroid removed years ago now. It's a mystery to this day why it was there and how it came to be. I suspect that it was a physical manifestation of the same problem.


My throat chakra, where my thyroid (at least half of it) still is, was the result of my inability to authentically express myself.

Sometimes when you are patient with yourself and take the time, you can figure out almost anything. I have learned that good communication starts with yourself. Being completely honest with yourself about where you're at in your life and be willing to share it openly with others.

I wish you a blessed day,
with love,
Carrie